People cannot always see clearly when they are in their own heads. I run across this all the time – it’s not because people lack intelligence or self-awareness, but because we all have blind spots. We repeat familiar stories. We protect old identities and we confuse what we have always done with what we must keep doing.
Thinking out loud changes the quality of reflection. When I listen to a client, I am listening not only for the facts but also for what keeps returning: the phrase they repeat, the option that brings their energy up, the trade-off they avoid naming, or the assumption hiding beneath the decision. (or that secret dream they had as a kid…)
That is one of the greatest benefits of career coaching. A coach offers an objective, confidential space where you can hear your own thinking more fully. Workplace coaching research also consistently emphasizes outcomes such as greater self-awareness, learning, performance, and goal attainment. The coach is not there to hand you a life plan. The coach helps you develop the clarity and confidence to build one that is genuinely yours.
My Process: Expand Before You Decide
My working sequence is simple. I call it the ‘See it Clearly’ or ‘Expansion Before Direction’ Framework: or, let’s just take a deep look before we decide to do anything.
1. Step Out of the Immediate Problem
We shift from “What should I do?” to “What is actually going on?” This helps separate the urgent feeling from the deeper issue. Sometimes the job is the problem. Sometimes it is only where the problem is showing up.
2. Expand the Landscape
We look across work, life, and identity. We explore responsibilities, growth, environment, relationships, lifestyle, values, energy, strengths, and where you are in your life. The purpose is to see the full picture before narrowing the options.
3. Surface Patterns and Tensions
We connect the dots. What themes keep returning? Where do your stated goals conflict with the conditions you say you need? What have you not yet given yourself permission to want—or to let go of?
4. Clarify What Matters Now
We identify present-day priorities, non-negotiables, trade-offs, and the conditions that feel best for moving forward. The words “right now” matter. What defined success in the past does not have to define it forever.
5. Choose a Direction, Not a Perfect Answer
Then we move into grounded action. You may decide to stay and redesign your role, strengthen your leadership approach, explore a new industry, test an idea, or begin a career transition. The goal is not certainty. It is enough clarity to take the next honest step.
Should I Stay or Leave My Job? There May Be More Than Two Choices
Career decisions are often framed as a binary: stay or go. But that framing can create unnecessary pressure and hide useful possibilities.
Before deciding, I encourage clients to ask:
What, specifically, is no longer working—and what is still working?
Is the misalignment coming from the role, the organization, the manager, the workload, or the way I am working?
What would need to change for staying to become a genuine choice rather than a default?
What am I hoping a new job will give me that I do not have now?
Which needs are non-negotiable in this stage of my life?
What small experiment could give me more information before I make a major move?
Sometimes these questions confirm that leaving is the right choice. Other times, they reveal that a thoughtful redesign would solve the real problem with less disruption. Either result is valuable because the decision comes from clarity rather than reaction.
So You Do Not Necessarily Need to Blow Up Your Career to Change Your Life
One of the most important things I want people to know is that transformation does not have to be dramatic. You do not always have to leave and upend your career. Sometimes the courageous move is to go. Sometimes it is even more courageous to stay and renegotiate. Sometimes it is to admit that an old ambition no longer belongs to you. And sometimes it is to take one small step toward a possibility you are not yet ready to name as a plan. Either way, the choice is yours – it’s just so much easier to have someone help you see it more clearly!
https://kpcoaching.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/kp-logo-retina.png00Kathy Parkshttps://kpcoaching.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/kp-logo-retina.pngKathy Parks2026-08-17 23:13:482026-08-17 23:23:45Why is it so hard to figure out my next career step alone or how do I find the clarity to make the right decision?
When people ask me, “What does a career coach do?” they are often expecting a practical answer: help me find a job, revise my résumé, prepare for an interview, fix up my LinkedIn profile, or decide whether I should stay or leave. Those things can absolutely be part of career coaching. But the most important work often comes before any of them. A great career coach helps you understand what has changed in you before you decide what needs to change around you. That distinction matters, because the answer may not be a new job at all. It may be a few tweaks, a redesigned role, a different way of leading, a clearer boundary, or a new definition of success that fits who you are now.
Key Takeaways: What Great Career Coaching Really Looks Like
It begins with what is really going on. Before asking, “What should I do?” I help clients step back and explore the deeper question: “What is actually happening?”
It looks beyond the job itself. Work does not exist in a vacuum. Life, identity, relationships, health, energy, values, and the season you are in all shape what will fit next.
It helps you hear yourself. Thinking out loud with someone who listens closely can reveal patterns, tensions, assumptions, and contradictions that are nearly impossible to see when you are caught inside your own mental loops.
It recognizes that feeling stuck may be a sign of growth. Sometimes the identity that helped you succeed no longer fits the person you are becoming.
It expands before it narrows. A strong coach does not push you toward the first plausible answer. Together, you open the landscape before deciding what matters most.
It does not promise a perfect answer. The aim is a direction that is honest, grounded, and fitting—and a next step you can actually take.
It makes room for more than one kind of change. You may leave, stay, redesign, renegotiate, or make a few targeted shifts. Transformation does not always require blowing up your career and running away!
Why Career Clarity Comes Before a Career Decision
When someone feels stuck in their career, the natural impulse is to solve the visible problem. Update LinkedIn. Search job boards. Make a pros-and-cons list. Start asking people what they think you should do.
I understand that impulse because action feels reassuring. But action taken before clarity can carry you straight from one version of the same problem into another. You might leave a difficult boss only to discover that the real issue was the kind of environment you were choosing. You may accept a bigger title and realize that what you really wanted was more time, freedom, or meaning. Or you could change companies without changing the pattern that was wearing you down in the first place.
This is why I begin by slowing the decision down just enough to see it clearly. I am not trying to keep someone stuck in analysis. I am trying to make sure the next move is connected to the life they actually want—not simply an escape from the discomfort they feel today.
Feeling Stuck in Your Career May Mean You Are Becoming Someone New
Many of the mid-career professionals I work with have built successful careers. They have been responsible, capable, and committed. Often, those same qualities make it difficult to admit that something no longer fits.
They may say, “I should be grateful,” “I have invested too much to change,” or “I don’t even know what else I could do.” Underneath those statements, I often hear a more important question: Who am I now, and what kind of work fits that person?
That question is not indulgent. It’s practical – and important. Our priorities and energy changes over time. Family responsibilities, health, loss, success, disappointment, age, and experience can all alter what we need from work. The professional identity that served us ten or twenty years ago may not be wrong; it may simply be incomplete for the person we are becoming.
A great career coach helps you explore that shift without rushing to label it as a crisis. Feeling unsettled can be information. So can boredom. Resentment, exhaustion, envy, or a recurring pull toward something different can all point toward a truth that has not yet been said clearly.
Stay tuned for Part II – the process that can help you find that clarity: Expand Before You Decide
https://kpcoaching.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/kp-logo-retina.png00Kathy Parkshttps://kpcoaching.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/kp-logo-retina.pngKathy Parks2026-08-08 22:27:532026-08-08 22:27:53What Does a Great Career Coach Do? (Hint: More Than Help You Find a Job!)
You’re not that happy in your job, you may be stuck, and for sure you are exhausted, frustrated, and not thinking straight about the whole thing. And your friends and family aren’t giving you brilliant advice either.
It might be time to slow down and ask yourself a few questions.
My favorite that I love to ask my clients is: What does success mean to you — right now, in this season of your life?
Our definition of success changes over time and you may not have stopped to think about it for awhile – what it means to you right now. Not what you thought when you were young, fresh in the job, not what your parents meant for you and especially not what you ‘should’ be doing. Sit with it for awhile and see what comes up.
Once that’s clear, here’s a few more questions to help you:
What are your non-negotiables, things you have to have in a job?
What would you willing to leave behind?
What should you be saying yes to more often?
What would you regret not trying?
How can you realign or rethink what you are doing?
You can actually reimagine your role from the inside and fall back in love with your work. If it still fits.
The answers are there, waiting for you to give them the space to be heard.
If you’re at a crossroads right now — start here.
What does success mean to you today?
https://kpcoaching.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/kp-logo-retina.png00Kathy Parkshttps://kpcoaching.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/kp-logo-retina.pngKathy Parks2026-03-24 20:55:002026-03-24 20:55:00What does success mean to you?
Things are constantly changing out there in the realm of the Job Search and probably faster than ever this year. Here (from what I’ve seen) are the top 3 biggest changes in the job search landscape lately, and these trends affect how people find jobs, how employers hire, and what skills are valued.
1. AI is now involved in almost every stage of hiring and is moving from a niche tool to a core part of recruiting. Companies are using AI to screen resumes, rank candidates, schedule interviews and some even in the hiring process. And candidates are also using AI tools for their resumes, cover letters, and applications. What does that mean for you and your job search? AI is now competing with AI in hiring pipelines! So be careful with using AI to create your documents (resumes etc) – keep it real, human and ‘you’ (original). Recruiters often see hundreds or thousands of applications, and if they are AI-generated, they don’t particularly like it. And many have just stopped looking at them altogether. Don’t just apply for a position, send your docs in and leave it at that. There is lots you can do to raise yourself above the noise.
2. Skills-based hiring is slowly replacing degree-based hiring – employers are focusing more on what you can do rather than what degree you have – which is good news! Some employers now explicitly prefer real-world experience over traditional degrees and want people who can deliver value immediately. So that means you also want to focus your resume on portfolios, projects, and certifications, as well as bootcamps, micro-credentials, and hands-on experience. And how you can hit the ground running and make a difference, quickly.
3. The job market is “cooler” and more selective and companies are hiring more cautiously than during the post-pandemic boom, especially with current economic conditions. Companies may be focusing on business-critical roles instead of broad hiring and some sectors are seeing job cuts. Some roles may take longer to fill, competition may be higher and networking and referrals are becoming more important than ever.
Changing times mean strategies must change as well. But now that you know what to pay attention to, a few tweaks in your process may be all you need to do. And nothing can replace good old fashion networking and human connection to help get you that exposure you need. Remember, successful job seekers treat job searching like a strategic campaign, it’s not just about submitting applications. It’s almost a full time job to get a full time job! But worth the effort when you get what you want.
https://kpcoaching.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/kp-logo-retina.png00Kathy Parkshttps://kpcoaching.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/kp-logo-retina.pngKathy Parks2026-03-11 16:22:532026-03-11 16:22:53The latest and greatest in the Job Search world
Psychological safety is people’s belief that they can speak up, ask questions, and make mistakes without fear of embarrassment or punishment. It’s an environment leaders should want to create because it is now recognized as one of the strongest predictors of learning behavior, innovation, quality improvement and team resilience.
In complex, fast-moving environments, silence is dangerous. Yet in my coaching work, many senior leaders still assume: “If there’s a problem, people will tell me.” (how many times have you actually told your boss that there is a problem with the team, the dynamics, or heaven forbid, them?)
In reality, people often don’t speak up because of past negative experiences, unclear expectations, subtle power dynamics and leaders’ non-verbal reactions – all the things that can get in the way of open and honest communication.
Psychologically safe leaders are valuable role models and you can learn their skills. They actively design conversations to invite contribution. They ask open, neutral questions, and reward candor, even when it is uncomfortable. Also uncomfortable – they admit their own mistakes publicly and respond constructively to challenge. Not easy but again with practice it gets easier.
One leadership team I supported believed they had an open culture. However, in confidential coaching sessions, team members described a lot of hesitation with challenging senior voices and also the fear of appearing incompetent kept them from speaking out. Some also expressed increasing frustrating at decisions being “pre-made”. Their leader had no idea. So we introduced a simple leadership practice – at the start of major discussions, the most senior person spoke last. This small structural change dramatically altered participation patterns.
This is a small example of a simple fix bringing great results and I’m sure there are tons more like that out there. A lot of little changes a leader can learn can improve every team environment and their communication. Psychological safety is built through consistent micro-behaviors and constantly checking back with your teams to see if it’s working.
The benefits are worth it!
https://kpcoaching.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/kp-logo-retina.png00Kathy Parkshttps://kpcoaching.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/kp-logo-retina.pngKathy Parks2026-03-03 01:15:562026-03-03 01:15:56Psychological safety – a few things for leaders to know….
Most people tell me they feel stuck. But when we slow the conversation down, what I usually hear is something quite different. They aren’t stuck – they’re unclear.
That may sound like a small distinction, but it isn’t.
Here’s a simple way to tell the difference. If you were truly stuck, you would know what you wanted – something outside of you would be blocking it and you just can’t see your way past. A company policy. A financial constraint. A lack of openings. A specific skill gap.
When you’re unclear, the problem is quieter and more frustrating. Because you don’t know what you don’t know. You don’t feel pulled toward anything strongly enough to act. You have ideas, but none feel right. And you keep waiting for certainty to come before you move. And that takes a long time or doesn’t come at all.
And then something even more human happens: You start blaming yourself.
“I should be more motivated.”
“I used to be driven.”
“Maybe I’m just tired of working.” (or even worse, “Maybe I’m just useless and will never figure it out!”)
It seems that you may be treating this as a motivation problem instead of a direction problem. So here are a few signs you’re more unclear than stuck:
You overthink every possible option.
Not because you’re indecisive — but because you don’t have a clear filter for what actually matters to you.
You say you’re open… but also feel strangely detached.
New roles, new paths, new ideas sound “fine,” but nothing creates real energy.
You keep asking practical questions before personal ones.
Salary. title. flexibility. location. Important – yes. But important enough to build a life around?
You feel restless, not desperate.
There’s discomfort, there’s frustration, but there isn’t a clear “this is what I really want instead.”
And here’s the part I care most about.
Unclear does not mean broken.
It does not mean you lack ambition.
It does not mean you’ve wasted your career.
It usually means you’re growing. You’re changing and your values are shifting. What once fit you, doesn’t seem to anymore. And that’s actually a good thing.
Most people were never taught how to pause and listen for what’s underneath the noise — the subtle fears, the unspoken trade-offs, the long-buried wants that keep tapping on the door.
So instead, they push harder – more effort, more productivity, more self-criticism.
That’s like pressing the gas when you don’t actually know where you’re going. (No wonder you are exhausted!)
Clarity doesn’t come from forcing a decision.
It comes from asking better questions:
What do I really want my work to support in my life?
What am I no longer willing to trade away?
What part of me have I been ignoring to stay “responsible”?
What do I need to say ‘no’ to, and even better, ‘yes’ to – finally.
You don’t need more pressure. You need a path you can confidently follow — one that reflects who you are now, not who you had to be when you started. And someone to help you create that path and help you work your way along it. Because it’s really hard to do on your own. (as you may have noticed!)
It’s also hard to look back and say, I wish I had done this or I should have done that instead.
It’s never too late to take that step towards no regrets.
https://kpcoaching.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/kp-logo-retina.png00Kathy Parkshttps://kpcoaching.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/kp-logo-retina.pngKathy Parks2026-02-15 00:04:322026-02-15 00:04:32Stuck vs. unclear: how to tell what’s actually holding your career back
Why is it so hard to figure out my next career step alone or how do I find the clarity to make the right decision?
/by Kathy ParksPeople cannot always see clearly when they are in their own heads. I run across this all the time – it’s not because people lack intelligence or self-awareness, but because we all have blind spots. We repeat familiar stories. We protect old identities and we confuse what we have always done with what we must keep doing.
Thinking out loud changes the quality of reflection. When I listen to a client, I am listening not only for the facts but also for what keeps returning: the phrase they repeat, the option that brings their energy up, the trade-off they avoid naming, or the assumption hiding beneath the decision. (or that secret dream they had as a kid…)
That is one of the greatest benefits of career coaching. A coach offers an objective, confidential space where you can hear your own thinking more fully. Workplace coaching research also consistently emphasizes outcomes such as greater self-awareness, learning, performance, and goal attainment. The coach is not there to hand you a life plan. The coach helps you develop the clarity and confidence to build one that is genuinely yours.
My Process: Expand Before You Decide
My working sequence is simple. I call it the ‘See it Clearly’ or ‘Expansion Before Direction’ Framework: or, let’s just take a deep look before we decide to do anything.
1. Step Out of the Immediate Problem
We shift from “What should I do?” to “What is actually going on?” This helps separate the urgent feeling from the deeper issue. Sometimes the job is the problem. Sometimes it is only where the problem is showing up.
2. Expand the Landscape
We look across work, life, and identity. We explore responsibilities, growth, environment, relationships, lifestyle, values, energy, strengths, and where you are in your life. The purpose is to see the full picture before narrowing the options.
3. Surface Patterns and Tensions
We connect the dots. What themes keep returning? Where do your stated goals conflict with the conditions you say you need? What have you not yet given yourself permission to want—or to let go of?
4. Clarify What Matters Now
We identify present-day priorities, non-negotiables, trade-offs, and the conditions that feel best for moving forward. The words “right now” matter. What defined success in the past does not have to define it forever.
5. Choose a Direction, Not a Perfect Answer
Then we move into grounded action. You may decide to stay and redesign your role, strengthen your leadership approach, explore a new industry, test an idea, or begin a career transition. The goal is not certainty. It is enough clarity to take the next honest step.
Should I Stay or Leave My Job? There May Be More Than Two Choices
Career decisions are often framed as a binary: stay or go. But that framing can create unnecessary pressure and hide useful possibilities.
Before deciding, I encourage clients to ask:
Sometimes these questions confirm that leaving is the right choice. Other times, they reveal that a thoughtful redesign would solve the real problem with less disruption. Either result is valuable because the decision comes from clarity rather than reaction.
So You Do Not Necessarily Need to Blow Up Your Career to Change Your Life
One of the most important things I want people to know is that transformation does not have to be dramatic. You do not always have to leave and upend your career. Sometimes the courageous move is to go. Sometimes it is even more courageous to stay and renegotiate. Sometimes it is to admit that an old ambition no longer belongs to you. And sometimes it is to take one small step toward a possibility you are not yet ready to name as a plan. Either way, the choice is yours – it’s just so much easier to have someone help you see it more clearly!
What Does a Great Career Coach Do? (Hint: More Than Help You Find a Job!)
/by Kathy ParksWhen people ask me, “What does a career coach do?” they are often expecting a practical answer: help me find a job, revise my résumé, prepare for an interview, fix up my LinkedIn profile, or decide whether I should stay or leave. Those things can absolutely be part of career coaching. But the most important work often comes before any of them. A great career coach helps you understand what has changed in you before you decide what needs to change around you. That distinction matters, because the answer may not be a new job at all. It may be a few tweaks, a redesigned role, a different way of leading, a clearer boundary, or a new definition of success that fits who you are now.
Key Takeaways: What Great Career Coaching Really Looks Like
Why Career Clarity Comes Before a Career Decision
When someone feels stuck in their career, the natural impulse is to solve the visible problem. Update LinkedIn. Search job boards. Make a pros-and-cons list. Start asking people what they think you should do.
I understand that impulse because action feels reassuring. But action taken before clarity can carry you straight from one version of the same problem into another. You might leave a difficult boss only to discover that the real issue was the kind of environment you were choosing. You may accept a bigger title and realize that what you really wanted was more time, freedom, or meaning. Or you could change companies without changing the pattern that was wearing you down in the first place.
This is why I begin by slowing the decision down just enough to see it clearly. I am not trying to keep someone stuck in analysis. I am trying to make sure the next move is connected to the life they actually want—not simply an escape from the discomfort they feel today.
Feeling Stuck in Your Career May Mean You Are Becoming Someone New
Many of the mid-career professionals I work with have built successful careers. They have been responsible, capable, and committed. Often, those same qualities make it difficult to admit that something no longer fits.
They may say, “I should be grateful,” “I have invested too much to change,” or “I don’t even know what else I could do.” Underneath those statements, I often hear a more important question: Who am I now, and what kind of work fits that person?
That question is not indulgent. It’s practical – and important. Our priorities and energy changes over time. Family responsibilities, health, loss, success, disappointment, age, and experience can all alter what we need from work. The professional identity that served us ten or twenty years ago may not be wrong; it may simply be incomplete for the person we are becoming.
A great career coach helps you explore that shift without rushing to label it as a crisis. Feeling unsettled can be information. So can boredom. Resentment, exhaustion, envy, or a recurring pull toward something different can all point toward a truth that has not yet been said clearly.
Stay tuned for Part II – the process that can help you find that clarity: Expand Before You Decide
What does success mean to you?
/by Kathy ParksYou’re not that happy in your job, you may be stuck, and for sure you are exhausted, frustrated, and not thinking straight about the whole thing. And your friends and family aren’t giving you brilliant advice either.
It might be time to slow down and ask yourself a few questions.
My favorite that I love to ask my clients is: What does success mean to you — right now, in this season of your life?
Our definition of success changes over time and you may not have stopped to think about it for awhile – what it means to you right now. Not what you thought when you were young, fresh in the job, not what your parents meant for you and especially not what you ‘should’ be doing. Sit with it for awhile and see what comes up.
Once that’s clear, here’s a few more questions to help you:
What are your non-negotiables, things you have to have in a job?
What would you willing to leave behind?
What should you be saying yes to more often?
What would you regret not trying?
How can you realign or rethink what you are doing?
You can actually reimagine your role from the inside and fall back in love with your work. If it still fits.
The answers are there, waiting for you to give them the space to be heard.
If you’re at a crossroads right now — start here.
What does success mean to you today?
The latest and greatest in the Job Search world
/by Kathy ParksThings are constantly changing out there in the realm of the Job Search and probably faster than ever this year. Here (from what I’ve seen) are the top 3 biggest changes in the job search landscape lately, and these trends affect how people find jobs, how employers hire, and what skills are valued.
1. AI is now involved in almost every stage of hiring and is moving from a niche tool to a core part of recruiting. Companies are using AI to screen resumes, rank candidates, schedule interviews and some even in the hiring process. And candidates are also using AI tools for their resumes, cover letters, and applications. What does that mean for you and your job search? AI is now competing with AI in hiring pipelines! So be careful with using AI to create your documents (resumes etc) – keep it real, human and ‘you’ (original). Recruiters often see hundreds or thousands of applications, and if they are AI-generated, they don’t particularly like it. And many have just stopped looking at them altogether. Don’t just apply for a position, send your docs in and leave it at that. There is lots you can do to raise yourself above the noise.
2. Skills-based hiring is slowly replacing degree-based hiring – employers are focusing more on what you can do rather than what degree you have – which is good news! Some employers now explicitly prefer real-world experience over traditional degrees and want people who can deliver value immediately. So that means you also want to focus your resume on portfolios, projects, and certifications, as well as bootcamps, micro-credentials, and hands-on experience. And how you can hit the ground running and make a difference, quickly.
3. The job market is “cooler” and more selective and companies are hiring more cautiously than during the post-pandemic boom, especially with current economic conditions. Companies may be focusing on business-critical roles instead of broad hiring and some sectors are seeing job cuts. Some roles may take longer to fill, competition may be higher and networking and referrals are becoming more important than ever.
Changing times mean strategies must change as well. But now that you know what to pay attention to, a few tweaks in your process may be all you need to do. And nothing can replace good old fashion networking and human connection to help get you that exposure you need. Remember, successful job seekers treat job searching like a strategic campaign, it’s not just about submitting applications. It’s almost a full time job to get a full time job! But worth the effort when you get what you want.
Psychological safety – a few things for leaders to know….
/by Kathy ParksPsychological safety is people’s belief that they can speak up, ask questions, and make mistakes without fear of embarrassment or punishment. It’s an environment leaders should want to create because it is now recognized as one of the strongest predictors of learning behavior, innovation, quality improvement and team resilience.
In complex, fast-moving environments, silence is dangerous. Yet in my coaching work, many senior leaders still assume: “If there’s a problem, people will tell me.” (how many times have you actually told your boss that there is a problem with the team, the dynamics, or heaven forbid, them?)
In reality, people often don’t speak up because of past negative experiences, unclear expectations, subtle power dynamics and leaders’ non-verbal reactions – all the things that can get in the way of open and honest communication.
Psychologically safe leaders are valuable role models and you can learn their skills. They actively design conversations to invite contribution. They ask open, neutral questions, and reward candor, even when it is uncomfortable. Also uncomfortable – they admit their own mistakes publicly and respond constructively to challenge. Not easy but again with practice it gets easier.
One leadership team I supported believed they had an open culture. However, in confidential coaching sessions, team members described a lot of hesitation with challenging senior voices and also the fear of appearing incompetent kept them from speaking out. Some also expressed increasing frustrating at decisions being “pre-made”. Their leader had no idea. So we introduced a simple leadership practice – at the start of major discussions, the most senior person spoke last. This small structural change dramatically altered participation patterns.
This is a small example of a simple fix bringing great results and I’m sure there are tons more like that out there. A lot of little changes a leader can learn can improve every team environment and their communication. Psychological safety is built through consistent micro-behaviors and constantly checking back with your teams to see if it’s working.
The benefits are worth it!
Stuck vs. unclear: how to tell what’s actually holding your career back
/by Kathy ParksMost people tell me they feel stuck. But when we slow the conversation down, what I usually hear is something quite different. They aren’t stuck – they’re unclear.
That may sound like a small distinction, but it isn’t.
Here’s a simple way to tell the difference. If you were truly stuck, you would know what you wanted – something outside of you would be blocking it and you just can’t see your way past. A company policy. A financial constraint. A lack of openings. A specific skill gap.
When you’re unclear, the problem is quieter and more frustrating. Because you don’t know what you don’t know. You don’t feel pulled toward anything strongly enough to act. You have ideas, but none feel right. And you keep waiting for certainty to come before you move. And that takes a long time or doesn’t come at all.
And then something even more human happens: You start blaming yourself.
“I should be more motivated.”
“I used to be driven.”
“Maybe I’m just tired of working.” (or even worse, “Maybe I’m just useless and will never figure it out!”)
It seems that you may be treating this as a motivation problem instead of a direction problem. So here are a few signs you’re more unclear than stuck:
You overthink every possible option.
Not because you’re indecisive — but because you don’t have a clear filter for what actually matters to you.
You say you’re open… but also feel strangely detached.
New roles, new paths, new ideas sound “fine,” but nothing creates real energy.
You keep asking practical questions before personal ones.
Salary. title. flexibility. location. Important – yes. But important enough to build a life around?
You feel restless, not desperate.
There’s discomfort, there’s frustration, but there isn’t a clear “this is what I really want instead.”
And here’s the part I care most about.
Unclear does not mean broken.
It does not mean you lack ambition.
It does not mean you’ve wasted your career.
It usually means you’re growing. You’re changing and your values are shifting. What once fit you, doesn’t seem to anymore. And that’s actually a good thing.
Most people were never taught how to pause and listen for what’s underneath the noise — the subtle fears, the unspoken trade-offs, the long-buried wants that keep tapping on the door.
So instead, they push harder – more effort, more productivity, more self-criticism.
That’s like pressing the gas when you don’t actually know where you’re going. (No wonder you are exhausted!)
Clarity doesn’t come from forcing a decision.
It comes from asking better questions:
What do I really want my work to support in my life?
What am I no longer willing to trade away?
What part of me have I been ignoring to stay “responsible”?
What do I need to say ‘no’ to, and even better, ‘yes’ to – finally.
You don’t need more pressure. You need a path you can confidently follow — one that reflects who you are now, not who you had to be when you started. And someone to help you create that path and help you work your way along it. Because it’s really hard to do on your own. (as you may have noticed!)
It’s also hard to look back and say, I wish I had done this or I should have done that instead.
It’s never too late to take that step towards no regrets.